Creating your future link by link

I’m watching A Christmas Carol tonight. I think of how this season for me was slow to start. I got into gear to make and write ,address cards,crafted homemade ornaments as gifts for a couple neighbors,grandchildren,children,a few others. I felt a bit accomplished and yet…. I haven’t felt that warmth or excitement that I have felt in the past with surprises for Mom,Children running down the stairs on Christmas morning,family dinner. There were traditions to keep. One was opening one small gift each on Christmas Eve….another from my grandparents and Mom that there was a tiny wrapped gift setting on a bough of the Christmas tree; hiding amidst ornaments and lights ,to hunt for. Then there were new traditions to make as well. These included stockings stuffed with candy, an orange and nuts to Crack open and enjoy( like they did in the Great Depression),a movie for the children to watch while we cooked up an amazing dinner and set the diningroom table. For weeks before there were Christmas cutouts,Russian teacakes, assorted chocolates,noughats,and “Buckeyes”to make with and without the children’s and husband’s helpful, happy pitching in. I would hum to very old fashioned Christmas Carol’s or put on some 80s Metal and happily make treasures for family and friends alike. It was my pleasure and my joy to pass on these goodies and the thoughtfulness behind them. I’ve always been a giver,prone to going overboard in everything I did for others. This was something instilled in me by my Dear Mother’s example time and time again. I am pleased to say both my children exhibit this thoughtfulness and attention to small details whether expensive or thrifty in cost . More as they grow older they exhibit compassion and gentleness of spirit. But they also show another trait that I admire. It is one of boundaries. I have been remiss in cultivating this attribute in the past. I have been working on it though. Well…this season I have noticed I’m just tired. I don’t have the will or inclination to ” bend over backwards” for people in general. And I have been increasingly grumpy ; not to put too fine a point on it. 🙂 there has been a great deal of self reflection upon this subject ( among others…) I have asked myself am I still a good person? Am I still a “good Christian”? It’s odd how one’s self talk can be exceedingly harsh and unforgiving. Not to make excuses for poor behavior especially within myself ,I have begun to ask different questions of myself. Such as this…am I 20 or 30? No. Am I as physically able as I was before? No. Do I respect others for their boundaries? Most definitely. Do kind , thoughtful people know and respect their own limitations? Absolutely! Therefore I must conclude ,as I recommend to you, that you be as kind to yourself as you are to others. That you practice self respect, that you love yourself as you do others. Take the time to detox emotionally,mentally and physically. Set respectful but firm limits on those who surround you. Choose wisely who you put effort into . If you are not receiving thoughtfulness in kind I suggest you make your requests known. After all no-one is a mind reader. Make your needs known, humbly,but make them known. Those who are thinking of your future and safety as well as your happiness as you regard them are priceless. Anything less is insufferable. You must value yourself. Not above others but equal to others. There is still time to forge new strong links.. There is time to strengthen and re-enforce weak links or replace those worn links in your chains with new ones . The chains you make in your life can be protective and strong.. or they can become chains of loneliness and bitterness that hold you and others back and down.. You can be an effective servant of God, and a servant to your fellow man only when your cup is full. May you be filled with joy unspeakable. May your storehouses be shaken and pressed together. And may your cup runneth over. Luke 6:38, Psalms 23:5